Zoloft Diaries, vol 1

I’ve been chasing the ghosts that haunt the edges of my vision again. Hoping to make them real. They’re not malign…some even show concern…but they are governed by laws and needs that keep them out of reach. But I feel like if I could just catch one, it would disperse some of this cloud that has settled around me.

I can’t really say how long its been. I’ve always had a baseline level of sadness that is just a normal part of my personality. This is different. These days I feel like I’ve been fighting off complete despair, which is not normal territory for me. I’m normally pretty emotionally resilient, I bounce back quickly from emotional upsets without too much trouble.

Its been a little over a week since I started on my medication prescription. I have some misgivings about it…I worry that its just something to make me feel less depressed about the things making me depressed without any of those things having to change. Something to lull me into complacency and acceptance.

But unfortunately the place I’m in has been difficult to bounce back from, so it seems like something is needed to take the edge off of these feelings. Perhaps it will give me the little something extra to coax my ghosts into reality.